Dear Priscilla, thank you for your comment. That's the point. The confusion. I would like to break the embedded tradition but somehow I can't. I have lived too long under the oppression and my parents beliefs which have become somehow my own. Therefore even when I know consciously that the way things are right now and have been are wrong and I should yearn to break the pattern.Deep down, unconsciously I would "prefer" my firstborn to be a male. It is a very complex situation....